I wrote an email to a friend today marveling about how great I feel. I haven’t felt this good for a long time. I’m trying to untangle why I feel so goood, so I can feel like this more often.
I crammed a lot of things into my weekend. There were a few ‘unusual’ things I did spontaneously that might have led to this irrepressible jubilance. I went snorkeling for an hour or so on Saturday morning at a shipwreck that’s just 15 minutes from my house. Occasionally, when I relax after spending time in the water, I get this strange floating sensation. It’s similar to the rocking motion you get when you’ve been on a boat and return to land. Apparently there’s a disorder called Mal de debarquement;
“A very sophisticated way of dealing with your environment is to form an internal model of it in your brain,” Dr. Hain said. “A boat is a perfect place for this kind of internal model to form. It’s rocking back and forth, and it gets into a rhythm that you start to be able to predict.”
I don’t experience the sensation as negative at all. If I lie on my bed after a surf I feel as though I’m floating in the waves, or that the waves are still washing over me. I actually enjoy it a lot. Anyway, last night, when the weekend was over, I’d come home and cooked an amazing dinner, I’d done all my chores and I was lying down to go to sleep when I was overcome with this floating sensation and a rush of energy. Made me feel so good.
On the weekends I often spend a lot of time doing things on my own, surfing, swimming, chores, cooking, walking etc. I need to spend a lot of time on my own and often feel resentful if people intrude on my alone time, but this weekend I had a really nice balance of socialising and quiet time. Snorkeling is one thing I really don’t like doing on my own, so this event was part of a Meetup activity with 17 other women. When I arrived, I realised an ex-housemate was also a member of the group, and it was fantastic reconnecting with her. It was kind of strange because I’m leaving here soon and I’ve been reflecting on my time here; this person was a housemate in the first house I lived in when I arrived, and man, as housemates do, we had some shit. It gave me a sense of closure.
On Sunday, I managed to stumble upon this incredible apocalyptic art exhibition. I wandered around this deserted, eerie decrepit space taking photos and marveling about the end of the world. I barely know what I’m doing photography wise, but the physical act of taking photos makes me feel incredibly peaceful, and abandoned and decaying buildings make me feel like I’m a kid getting up to mischief.
So, I don’t know. Weird floating sensations, connection and aloneness, and abandoned derelict buildings, give me a bit of bounce.
In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Re-springing Your Step.”